Day 94: Small victories in red shoes.

I’m late posting this, as I went to bed with another migraine forming last night due to pending thunderstorms. The barometric pressure can really squeeze the life out of a brain.

But oh – what a wonderful day! It was a day of firsts, a day to be proud of, one to remember forever.


Wow. What a day! We had our first Escaping Fed film screening and Q&A today at a local college campus, for their criminal justice department. It was wonderful. I was fine, not nervous at all. I felt at ease and unintimidated by the “strangers” around me. So I did much better than I expected after these six years of isolation.

The group was engaged, interactive, inquisitive and receptive. Could it have gone better? Really, no. Even things we need to perfect or change were okay and made me very hopeful for the future…and that we can make a difference in the future of law enforcement, if we get out there enough.

I felt great about how little focus was put on Fed and how much was kept on the criminal justice system. I tell people all of the time that the film is NOT about Fed, so much as it is about the criminal justice failures that happened because of this Fed situation. Today, that message seemed clear.

Well, except for the professor still verbally attesting he thinks Fed will still come for me. But that is okay. Other people can think that. I don’t care about Fed enough to care what he will do, anymore. Couldn’t give a s***. I don’t care anymore about what he will or won’t do…it is about what I do, that counts. We all get limited days on this earth. I will be measured by what I did with my days, not how those days ended. Still, I am always so surprised how vocal people are about how I am “dead.” Last I checked, not dead.

After I got home, I wrote seven articles for a client. Keeping things moving forward, bit by bit.


It was a GREAT day marked by the speaking engagement, then handling my weekly errands and personal affairs. I cleaned my place and went to bed smiling. So despite the migraine, all felt “in order” in my world.


I did the number of steps I’m supposed to do each day but failed to work out due to the coming migraine in the evening. I hate being controlled by the weather, but I am. So I retreated to bed a bit early and enjoyed something I never really pursue alone, a frozen cocktail. I thought it might take the edge off my migraine. It did not. In fact, I kept waking throughout the night to take aspirin and re-dampen the cold wet rag I placed over my eyes.


I did nothing major materially, besides bringing in a little money with client work – the seven articles – and spending little. Got groceries. A few steps forward and none backwards. But spent far too many minutes trying to get a customer service person to understand that midnight is the first minute on a day, not the last minute on the prior day. I was scheduling a payment for the 18th and she kept arguing that 12am between the 17th and 18th actually occurs on the 17th. Ugh. What are our schools coming to? Feels the same as when I lived in Alaska and always had to answer the customer service question of, “What money do they use in Alaska?”

…and I did all of this in cute red flats that scream, “I’m still here.” 🙂